The Supermom Trap: How Indian Working Mothers Are Redefining a Loaded Ideal 

New research reveals India’s “Supermom” ideal is a double-edged sword for working mothers. A study of over 300 earning mothers shows a near-even split: half view the concept as an empowering source of strength, defining it through competence, balance, and emotional well-being. The other half see it as a detrimental trap, creating unrealistic expectations that lead to exhaustion and guilt. Crucially, mothers’ definitions are more nuanced than simply “doing it all,” focusing on psychological resilience and personal fulfillment.

This divide highlights that a mother’s experience is shaped by her unique support system and societal pressures. The findings call for a shift from expecting individual superhuman effort to building systemic support through equitable partnerships, flexible workplaces, and policies that value caregiving. Ultimately, the goal is to replace the unsustainable “Supermom” myth with the reality of a truly “Supported Mom.”

The Supermom Trap: How Indian Working Mothers Are Redefining a Loaded Ideal 

For generations, the image of the mother in India has been draped in reverence and expectation. She is Shakti—strength, resilience, and nurturing incarnate. But in today’s urban landscape, this ancient ideal has merged with a modern archetype: the “Supermom.” 

We see her everywhere—in media profiles of celebrity moms, in advertisements featuring a flawlessly dressed woman effortlessly managing a boardroom and a kitchen, and in the silent, often unspoken, comparisons in our own social circles. She is the woman who is supposed to “have it all” and “do it all,” without ever seeming to break a sweat. 

But what do the women living this reality actually think? Is the “Supermom” a source of empowerment or a recipe for exhaustion? Groundbreaking new research delves into the minds of over 300 earning mothers across India, uncovering a complex and deeply divided truth that challenges everything we thought we knew. 

Beyond “Doing It All”: A More Nuanced Reality 

The traditional definition of a supermom is a woman who seamlessly excels in every domain of her life—career, home, parenting, and personal well-being. However, the study, led by researchers Shalaka Sharad Shah et al., found that earning mothers have far more elaborate and personal definitions. 

For many, being a supermom isn’t about perfection; it’s about competence and balance. They define it through a powerful lens of psychological resources: 

• “A supermom is emotionally balanced and physically healthy even after job and home responsibilities,” shared one professor and mother of two. 

• Another described her as a mom who creates a “beautiful balance between her own space… her work, and her family. Each supermom has their way of balancing. There is nothing right or wrong about it.” 

This reframing is crucial. It rejects the notion of a solitary struggler and embraces adaptability, resourcefulness, and the strategic use of support systems. For these women, “super” is less about innate, magical ability and more about developed skill, a positive attitude, and the pursuit of fulfilment without martyrdom. 

Furthermore, a significant number of mothers pushed back against the term altogether, arguing that all mothers are “super.” As one full-time professor stated, “All moms are supermoms – whether working or non-working.” This perspective validates the immense, often invisible, emotional and physical labour performed by all mothers, challenging the hierarchy that often pits working and stay-at-home mothers against each other. 

The Great Divide: Source of Strength vs. Heavy Burden 

The most striking finding of the research is the near-even split in how mothers perceive this notion. 

For 51%, the ideal is beneficial and empowering. These women see the “Supermom” concept as a motivating force. It represents their ability to provide for their families, achieve personal growth, and explore different facets of their identity. Juggling roles is not a burden but a source of pride and dignity. As one mother explained, it’s beneficial because “the more you get involved, the more you explore your life – personally or professionally.” 

For 49%, the ideal is a detrimental trap. The other half of respondents view the “Supermom” standard as an unrealistic, exhausting, and damaging myth. They articulate the immense pressure it creates, the impossibility of the task, and the inevitable guilt that follows. 

• “There is nothing like a Supermom or Superwoman in this world… Achieving a perfect balance is difficult,” said an Associate Professor. 

• Others were more blunt, calling the tag “the problem” and a “societal trap” that sets women up for failure and distress. They argue for a gentler, more human standard: “A mom is a mom, Period!” 

This divide highlights that there is no universal experience. An individual’s view is likely shaped by her unique ecosystem of support, workplace flexibility, personal values, and the social feedback she receives daily. 

The Real-World Impact: Why This Matters 

This isn’t just an academic debate. How a mother internalizes the “Supermom” ideal has real consequences for her well-being, her career, and her family. 

• For Individuals: Mothers who see the ideal as a trap risk burnout, anxiety, and a diminished sense of self-worth when they inevitably can’t meet the impossible standard. Recognizing this can be the first step toward setting healthier boundaries and practicing self-care. 

• For Families and Partners: This research is a call to action. The solution isn’t for women to become more “super”; it’s for families to dismantle the unequal distribution of domestic labour. The “second shift,” identified decades ago, is still a reality. True support means active, shared responsibility in childcare and household tasks. 

• For Employers and Policymakers: Companies need to move beyond superficial perks and implement concrete, supportive practices. This includes flexible work arrangements, robust parental leave for all parents, mentorship programs for mothers returning to work, and a culture that does not penalize caregiving responsibilities. The government can incentivize these practices and ensure the effective implementation of family-friendly policies. 

Moving Forward: From Supermom to Supported Mom 

The conversation needs to shift from “Can women have it all?” to “How can we better support mothers in all their roles?“ 

The goal should not be to create more superhumans, but to create a more supportive environment that allows mothers to thrive without having to be superhuman. It’s about celebrating effort over perfection, collaboration over solo endurance, and humanity over mythical ideals. 

The Indian earning mother isn’t asking for a cape. She’s asking for a partner, a flexible schedule, a supportive boss, and a society that values her well-being as much as her output. It’s time we listened.